Adultery isn't just wrong; it's stupid!

Happy Valentine's Day! I have writer's block this morning so I've pulled this out of my files. I wrote this after reading an article in "Leadership" Magazine by Randy Alcorn and before I got married. Much of this list I took directly from him but I added to it and tweaked it some. It has evolved since I first started it 21 years ago.

This list has reminded me several times of some of the practical reasons to stay faithful to my husband by reminding me of the consequences of adultery. We live in a culture that gives us so many encouragements to be unfaithful...but they do not usually show us the consequences of adultery. So...without further ado...

22 consequences in my life should I choose to commit adultery...

1. Grieving my Redeemer who has already forgiven me of so many sins
2. Causing shame upon the sacred name of God and the calling of the ministry
3. Following in the footsteps of others whose immorality forfeited their marriages or ministries and caused great pain to the body of Christ : (there is a list of names in my personal file that, sadly, over the years has grown - I keep the list not to shame them but to remind me)
4. Inflicting untold hurt on Shawn, the man I’ve promised to cherish and be faithful to and losing his trust and respect as well as the wonderful freedom we have known in our marriage.
5. Crushing my beloved children, Erik, Corrie, and Gracie and having to explain to them "why we aren't pastor's anymore."
6. Destroying my example and credibility with my children and crippling future efforts to teach them to obey God in every area of their lives.
7. If Shawn be unable to forgive me, I could lose my marriage and my family forever.
8. I would lose respect for myself and create a guilt hard to shake. Even if God, Shawn, and the kids forgive me, would I be able to forgive myself?
9. Forming memories that would plague future intimacy with my husband, both on my part and his.
10. Forfeiting years of rewarding ministry, possibly permanently.
11. Forfeiting my ministerial credentials and the respect of my fellow ministers in the Assemblies of God (list of names of men and women whose respect I desire)
12. Forfeiting the effect of years of witnessing to my best friend, "M", and encouraging her to continue in immorality.
13. Undermining the faithful example of other Christians.
14. Bringing great pleasure to Satan, the enemy of my soul.
15. Possibly destroying the family of the person with whom I committed adultery and knowing that I was a “home wrecker.”
16. Possibly bearing in my body the effects of my sin with sexually transmitted diseases. Possibly infecting Shawn, and in the case of AIDS, causing his death.
17. Possibly facing the effects of a pregnancy with its personal, financial and family obligations.
18.  Dealing with the aftermath of a broken heart and the emotional pain that comes from loving and losing.
19. Bringing shame to members of my church (list names):
20. Causing shame and hurt to these friends, whom I have taught, discipled, or led to Christ: (list names).
21. Bringing shame and embarrassment to my parents, uncle and aunt, and brother and sister whom I want to be proud of me.
22. Invoking shame and lifelong embarrassment upon myself.


If I choose to commit adultery it wouldn't just be wrong, it would be stupid.

bittersweet thoughts

What a time it has been since I last posted! I have spent the last week fighting a bronchial infection and finally gave up the fight last Thursday and just went to bed! Now I'm back up...but something happens to a house when momma is down...so there's plenty of work to do!

The election has come and gone. Come next January we will have a new president. According to Scripture, we are to pray for those in authority and show respect for their office. Let's do that whether we voted for him or not. I cannot imagine filling that office at this time in history. The Bible tells me that the heart of the king is in the hands of God and I will trust that.

Today is a bit of a bittersweet day - little V who has lived with us since he was 8 months old is leaving for his adoptive home. This is a good thing since he will be able to be with a forever family and they are also taking his older sister who is 5 so that they will stay together. HOORAY! He is such a precious little fellow that he will be a blessing to their family even though he has developed in to a VERY active toddler.

But it is bittersweet for our family...especially my girls who have become very attached to him. We come into foster care knowing that the vision that God has given us with this ministry is to strengthen families who may be struggling and assist them in growing into a more healthy family unit. In doing this, I really like to get to know the birth families and spend time with them. After all, our community is only as strong as its families.

But sometimes, as in V's case, things don't work out for him to go home. I am thankful that there are those families who are willing to open their hearts and homes to children in crises and give them that forever family.

We all work together in this system: foster families who provide a family setting for children and work to get them back home and families who commit to raising those children when they don't go back.

Either way it is an adventure...I thank God for the opportunity that He has given me to reach into the lives of the children in my community...even though sometimes it is bittersweet!

Hang in there! We're all in this together!

Man jumps off bridge; leaves note for Obama

Allright - I think today's post will be a rant:

I try to keep up with some of the happenings in my home state of Texas...and this one is just sad.

Yesterday (October 31, 2008) a 52 year old man jumped off the "Spaghetti Bowl" (this is a place where several highway interchanges meet and they usually stack up over each other) in El Paso and left behind a note to Barack Obama saying "Obama - Please take care of my family."

I don't know anything about this man (his name hasn't even been released), nor do I normally comment on things like this because of the pain that people are experiencing at the time. Typically prayer and support are the order of the day and I truly hope that this family is receiving that. I have buried family members who died at their own hand and I know the pain, confusion and guilt that it brings so please don't write me that I have no compassion.

But here's where this story frustrates me: What a sad day when a husband and father feels so lost and incapable that he feels free to remove himself from the lives of his wife and children and turn them over to the care of big government. Is this the end result thinking of socialism - "I refuse to take responsibility for my family - that's why the government exists." Here's a thought: It's NOT the government's responsibility to take care of our families - that responsibility belongs to us. It doesn't take a village to raise a child - it takes a family. The thing that we see across our country that so scares and saddens me is that many of our moms and dads are willing to stop doing what moms and dads need to do and capitulate that responsibility to someone else.

Yes, sometimes we need other people to help us out in hard times but I know that as a mom when it comes to the care of my family "The Buck Stops Here." This is my home, my husband, and my kids...and it's my job to take care of them to the best of my ability and with the help of God.

Just my two-cents worth.

A wolf and his pack

One of the neat things about being involved with the kids education is that I am reading, re-reading, and finally reading some great literature. I came across this line in Kipling's The Law of the Jungle just this morning:

Now this is the Law of the Jungle -- as old and as true as the sky;
And the Wolf that shall keep it may prosper, but the Wolf that shall break it must die.
As the creeper that girdles the tree-trunk the Law runneth forward and back --
For the strength of the Pack is the Wolf, and the strength of the Wolf is the Pack.

I've been thinking this morning about the many ways this applies to my family, my church, my job, especially this particular thought: when one suffers we all suffer; when one is successful we all are successful.

The scriptures tell us to"bear one anothers burdens, and in so doing, fulfill the Law of Christ." Sounds pretty close to Kipling's observation of the natural order of the Law of the Jungle.

Lord, help me today to remember the importance of each individual in my "pack" and help me as an individual to so do my part to make my "pack" a bastion of strength in this jungle in which we are living.

Thanks, Rudyard, for a great quote!

We're all in this together!